Sunday, January 2, 2011

Happy New Me!

So another year has gone by. What promises will we make ourselves this year that we'll totally disregard in about 2 months time? Have we learned anything new about ourselves or about life in general? You hope that as humans we keep evolving and growing but do we? There are times I feel so stagnant like nothing within me is evolving or changing except for the face that I see in the mirror and we won't even go there. For women that is one sad journey! Its only because we tie in so much of our emotional life to how we look and aging is a big step in the evolutionary cycle of our lives and it happens whether we want it to or not, for most of us anyway.
Okay, this is the first resolution I would like to make, I would like to stop judging myself. Stop judging my looks, my weight, what I haven't accomplished. I am so tired of waking up every morning and going over what I won't eat today so I don't gain weight. What I won't wear so I don't look fat or how much makeup I need to cover up some god-forsaken flaw that only I can see.
How about we do the opposite of dieting? Why don't we try eating when we're actually hungry and not just salads. Lets actually eat what we enjoy but in moderation. Why don't we stop obsessing over exercising a certain number of hours in a week and just move. Go out and take a walk with a friend or move all your furniture and dance.
I am so bored with having conversations that go like this: "Oh my god I feel so bloated today I think I gained 20 pounds over the holidays but I'm starting this NEW DIET the first of the year where I only eat the crust of the bread and the juice of a banana for a month and I'll lose like 30 pounds in a week". Seriously? C'mon we have to stop tying our happiness to our weight and our looks.
There are much more serious things in life than your jean size or how many wrinkles you have around your eyes when you smile. Mind you I am not saying to load up on fried foods and throw all vanity out the window but we as a people have to stop with this obsession, me included.
Another resolution, learn how to take a compliment. How many times has someone said something complimentary to you and you come up with a hundred reasons for why they're wrong? I do it all the time. You are essentially calling them liars and its none of your business. These are they're opinions and its not your job to question them. The proper response for a compliment is "THANK YOU", thats all but its surprising how hard it is to accept any complement graciously.
Last resolution, to not be so judgmental of others. Nothing is ever completely black and white. We don't know what people go through everyday and sometimes people just need a break. I want to be a more patient person with myself and with others. We are all just trying to get by, to survive with dignity and hopefully with a little happiness thrown in. Try smiling at someone you don't know. Helping someone without be asked to help. Sometimes just giving up your seat on a subway to someone that looks pretty tired will do. Ask yourself how you can be a better person this year and make a reasonable resolution, one you can stick to. Smiles are cheap but they're made of gold.